For this assigned blog we were to watch one last WWII movie and post a review about it. Due to the feud of sorts between myself and Mr. Bruns over whether or not Pearl Harbor is a good movie, well, let's give a review.
Michael Bay, the director of Pearl Harbor, is one of the worst filmmakers of all time (Transformers trilogy, Armageddon). Plain and simple, so what do you expect when he does a serious drama about the start of American involvement in one of the most deadly wars in the history of mankind? Hang on, the studio says, let's make it as money-making as possible. Add a cliche love story. No, strike that, add ALL CLICHES, so not just a love story, a feud between friends, a seperation between friends, a betrayal between friends, a girl who is almost forced to love her boyfriend's best friend, a catastrophe takes place right in the middle of it, a character who is bound to be dead, but wait, he's alive! A small group or unlikely person rises up to the challenge and survives, etc. This is not my full review, this is just to get you into perspective.
So the movie starts with two friends enlisting in the military, Ben Affleck and an actor we really don't know or care about in the buddy-role. They both fall head-over-heels over a nurse who is inspecting them to make sure they are ready for duty, and they get stationed in the same place. How convinient. At this point in the movie, any sane person would skip to the battle scenes and leave the rest alone. But for a full grade and the sake of insulting/correcting Mr. Bruns over his views of the film, I must press on.
So in a raid for Britain, Ben Affleck has to fly and naturally get shot down. So he's out of the story for about half an hour. But wait, the action doesn't stop there: now buddy-role wants his girlfriend the nurse. So half an hour goes by and here Ben Affleck returns. So he goes back, learn what's going on, and does what any controlled, sane and calm person would do: talk to them about the issue and try to solve it. There, see. This movie is smart. But NO! They fight about it!
So after almost a full two hours of this repetitive love story that has dragged on and on and on, we finally get to the attack on Pearl Harbor. I must say, the visual effects are impressive and the explosions and things are ok, but we're being excited over this. This is like Bruce Willis in a car chase in a Die Hard movie. Wasn't the attack on Pearl Harbor an act of war that was a tragety and a suffering for millions of Americans? Why are we cheering at explosions and things? This is really where I stop blaming the movie's badness on the love story and get down to the bones: it is a summer movie meant for summer action entertainment, and its about a very serious subject where Americans lost their lives, and we are cheering?
After this, to make the movie feel epic and Oscar-worthy, they drag it on for another hour. Now they show Ben Affleck and buddy-role in war against the Japanese venging the attack on Pearl Harbor. This attack is similar to Ben Affleck's first big scene, but they end up landing just short of safe ground and end up in another attack, this time on land. Buddy-role gets shot, Ben Affleck gets sad, buddy-role dies, I roll my eyes, and we move on the the final five minutes of the film. We get back to the states and the nurse ends up marrying Ben Affleck and they live a happy life away from fighting and away from cliches. Oh wait, there's another one.
I really don't look badly on this film because nobody likes it, and not because it has every cliche in the big old cliche book, but because its motives are all wrong. As I said, the film had a large budget, big stars, at least some, and was released in the dead-center of the summer action movies, which is all-together the wrong place if they really wanted to pay respect to the lives of the Americans who lost their lives on December 7 1941. Instead Michael Bay, Touchstone Pictures, and the stars made the movie as a way to make even more money and to add another blockbuster to their list. I feel bad for anybody who loves the movie because it has explosions and dead people in it. If anything, I enjoy watching the insanity of the attack, which is not very well shown overall, but they really don't pull it off. Instead they add the key ingredient to get the eyes wet with tears: cheese.
Well, let me tell you: all the cheese in the world is not going to put tears in these eyes, so you might as well stop right there. I give the film 1 star out of 5. That may sound cruel, but when you see the film from my point of view, it sounds ok. The roughness of my review may make it sound like 0, but at least they included the attack. If they really wanted 0 out of 5, just talk about it in a war room and show Ben Affleck crying over another guy he barely even knew die. I think that's all I have to say. Stay away from this film if you aren't looking for action entertainment mocking a serious deadly tragety.
Comments
Great summary to a great movie!! :)