Now its time for a creature feature about cute little things, bad ugly things, a town getting destroyed, and, yes, Snow White in the movie theater. Why don't we throw in Christmas, Chinese shops, and crazy inventions. Oh wait, they do. This might just be a consideration for the craziest, wildest film of all time. Its not really a film for children, but it might be too cute and light on gore for adults. I don't know what's going to happen on the grading scale on this one.
Plot time:
We start with Rand Peltzer, an inventor looking around Chinatown or somewhere for a Christmas present for his son Billy. He looks in a store and finds a cute little thing called a Mogwai, a sort of music box that lives, but its also supposedly a cute little creature, even if we don't see it until half an hour into the movie. The old man who owns the store denies selling it to him, but the grandson does to him, but he warns him: three rules, one: no sunlight. Two: no water. Three: No feeding after midnight.
Billy, Mr. Peltzer's son doesn't exactly have the best life. The girl he likes, Kate, a co-worker of his employing bank and half-time worker at a bar as well, ignores him, his car is a piece of junk, he has to take his dog to work, and worst of all is old lady Ms. Deagle, a truly evil woman who threatens him and his dog, and also is devilishly rich and selfish.
So now Rand gets home and gives the gift to Billy early. The Mogwai is revealed, and Billy takes it as a new pet. His neighbor, Pete, played by Corey Feldman, who I will talk about in a few more movie reviews soon, comes over and at one point spills water all over Gizmo, the Mogwai's name. Suddenly little balls shoot out of his back and we realize he has given birth to little Mogwais.
The leader has a stripe, thus his name, begins to pull tricks on Billy, his dog, and Gizmo, their parent. Billy takes one in to his science teacher, where he gets another one to keep on his own. The other Magwai play one last trick and bite the cord on Billy's digital clock so that he can feed them after midnight.
He wakes up the next morning to find they have turned into cocoons. Only Gizmo remains the same. The other Mogwai in the school eats a sandwhich and becomes a Gremlin after going through the cocoon process. It eats the teacher's hand and he bleeds to death. Billy manages to kill it, but he goes home to find that the other five have hatched.
Billy's mom kills two after knifing one, putting it in a blender and then putting another in a microwave where it explodes. Quite strong for a PG. Rand is away on a business meeting, but Stripe escapes and goes to a pool, leaps in, and creates an army of hundreds of Gremlins.
They then go on a massive destruction across town, killing dozens of people includin Ms. Deagle in one of the funniest scenes ever put to film. Eventually they attack the bar where Kate works, and Billy saves her. This is also one of the funniest scenes ever put to film. After a brief rest, the Gremlins gather in a movie theater and watch Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, also one of the funniest scenes ever put to film.
Billy hatches a plan where he will blow up the entire army. He succeeds, and only Stripe survives. He chases them into a department store where Billy is attacked by Stripe with a chainsaw. After losing, Stripe goes over to a water fountain where he can reproduce another army, but Gizmo comes to save the day as he lifts the blinds and watches as bright lights, similar to sunlight destroys Stripe.
A few days later, the old Chinese man returns to the Peltzer house to take back Gizmo, saying that he cannot be kept by someone who is not responsible. As he walks away with Gizmo, Mr. Peltzer warns: "So if your air conditioner goes on the fritz or your washing machine blows up or your video recorder conks out, before you call the repairman, turn on all the lights, check all the closets and cupboards, look under all the beds. 'Cause you never can tell. There just might be a gremlin in your house."
So now for grading scale:
Acting: 7 out of 10. A little more than standard.
Entertainment: 9 out of 10. Some parts are a little thrilling and some might unsettle a few people, but its still really entertaining.
Screenplay: 10 out of 10. Very, very smartly written.
Directing: 7 out of 10. Joe Dante does a great job.
Technical Credits: 9 out of 10. Very well done on both the Gremlins and Mogwai.
Genre Fit: 3 out of 10. Bounces back and forth between family comedy, crazy black comedy, and pure horror film. Unbalanced so the rating is low.
MPAA Rating: 2 out of 10. This is the real problem with the film. Its violent, its scary, and its gruesome, and yet it has a PG Rating. Its because of Gremlins and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom that we have the PG-13 rating today.
Stupid Scenes: 10 out of 10. None.
Deeper Message: 3 out of 10. Nothing really.
Beginning: 26 out of 30. Very great start.
Middle: 29 out of 30. Brilliant.
Ending: 27 out of 30. Great ending as well.
Final Score: 142/180 or 79%. Just short of an A-, but its the strongest B+ you can get.
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